It’s New Day

by - Juli 10, 2012

ohkay…after so long , finally I’m blogging. Anyhoos, So what have i been up to recently? Honestly, when was the last time i blogged? Urh, last year was it? *checks*

Since 1 month ago, i've been... slacking around, doing last minute all the homework, been passing the final exams (and the result?hah, forget ‘bout it), been addicted of the sims social, procrastinating reading and writing, procrastinating starting some business. I know! I could have a PhD in Procrastination. Maybe I’ve been do something useful too…such as starting my exercise class, trying so hard following the class in this university, mudik almost every week. Hmm, and what else? I have no idea cause I didn’t write my activity on the diary anymore, I forget what happened 1 month back ~(@-@)~

Why I didn’t write anymore….there’s so many excuse..the bad excuse ,such as I was busy. Yeah busy with all the the thing that I didn’t understand. But maybe the true reason is even the worst or happiest condition come to ma life, There’s nothing can make me feel wholeheartedly. Or I just don’t care. Maybe I became so numb. So I don’t have any inspiration to write even on my diary. I’m think to much, but I’m not thinking at all. I should feel angry or happy or enthusiastic when someone, somewhere, something come to my life. but I think I don't feel anything. Is it be better to feel nothing than to feel hurt?

Sometimes, a dream is just a dream. Sometimes, a dream is a mission or a goal. Sometimes, a dream is a fantasy. Sometimes, a dream can guide us through life. Sometimes, a dream can strengthen or weaken us. But sometimes, a dream is just a dream. And life is just life,too.

And yeeaaaah….i didn’t feel comfortable with this condition. Cause its not me. as long as i know ‘bout my self, I am self-motivated, always enthusiasm, having excellent life and dreams, and know what the purpose of ma life is. oki-doki its time for change. And I missed being able to put colours in my life! Live is short, live it up.

Well, I'm going home, down hearted and hoping I'm close to some new beginning. I know there's a reason for everything that comes and goes. But so many people are looking to me to be strong and to fight, but I'm just surviving. And I may be weak but I'm never defeated and I'll keep believing in clouds with that sweet silver lining. And most days, I try my best to put on a brave face but inside, my bones are cold and my heart weaks. But all the while, something's keeping me safe and alive. And I won't give up like this. I will be given strength. Now that I've found it, nothing can take that away. I don't wanna waste another day~

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